(Cue Jeopardy music)
The answer is yes and no. I was talking with my significant other (S.O.) and the conversation veered its way to the early days of our relationship. I was reminded of how confident I was and how since I had nothing to lose, in a sense, I behaved and responded in a way that was found both sexy and appealing. My S.O. was attracted to my east coast attitude and my quick tongue and somehow I let both simmer down to a point that I was slowly become someone other than the person that she entered into a relationship with. What happened to that girl? Where did I go? At what point in our few month long relationship did I flip the script?
I had become a "pleaser". In trying to "make" a successful relationship I tried to tailor my behavior and responses to what I thought would be pleasing. I endeavored not to complain when a complaint would have been the reasonable response. I turned into a demure, passive, silent type which, anyone who knows anything about me knows, is no where near my personality type.
Hearing that my boo missed the side of me that was a little rowdy, a little dramatic and slightly emotional was a breath of fresh air. The truth is a relationship cannot be made it has to be lived. We are two different people that have entered into something that has a life of its own. In all things change is required but it should never alter the core of who you are. If your cologne makes your partner sneeze..change it! If your cursing causes your boo to cringe during every conversation, consider picking up a copy of a Vocabulary Builder . If your shuga dumpling says every time you breathe they wish that you would stop..take a deep breath..grab your Coach bag..and start the car (waiting for them to move from in front of it is optional)
Change for the better is a good thing when the source of that change is you. I am grateful that someone took time to notice that the person I am is pretty fly and that I need to be confident in that. Today is a good day to look at who you are and take account of what makes you great...Today I was reminded that fly is not a characteristic..it is a way of life!.Embrace it, Love it, Live it!
3 Interruptions...(comments):
I agree, you are pretty fly. I really like what you had to say. :)
Thats what I'm talking about. Change the bad behavior but dont change who you are. Look at you being all deep and insightful, Smiley. I'm loving it!!!
Just picked up my copy of Vocabulary builder! Thanks!
I think that change is a must in relationships. As long as your partner coaches you, as you coach them, to change in a positive direction. Change should be inspired by love, not desire. It's all about what works best for you. As you embrace that change, allow it to, loving, trickle down to your partner. This makes for a healthy relationship were you can both grow independently, and ultimately together at the same time. Love it.
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